5 Things I did differently during this third pregnancy to feel more comfortable mentally and physically
Last pregnancy I was still working out 5-6 days a week at 35 weeks. It would be 2 weeks before I gave up teaching spin classes, after experiencing symptoms during and after class for MONTHS. I was still lifting heavy, walking every day, and pushing myself to have a fit pregnancy.
At 38 weeks, what I currently am as I write this, I was still working in the gym- not accepting help from clients to pick up heavy weights and demo-ing exercises all day long. I was planning 9 months on, 9 months off weight loss posts. I wasn’t thinking about how to make my birth and postpartum experience more comfortable and empowering. I was only thinking about my body, my fitness, focusing on not losing muscle mass and keeping weight gain to a minimum. I wasn’t thinking about my mental health or my core and pelvic floor health (not REALLY.)
This pregnancy, I’ve changed a lot of things. As I approach my final stretch of this pregnancy, I’m reflecting back on how this third trimester has been so different from my last two. This entire pregnancy has felt more comfortable for me. I’ve felt calmer, more aware and accepting of how my body is changing, more willing to change myself as I see I need to during this time. It’s like I finally realize that pregnancy is temporary and my changing to better fill the needs of my body during this time won’t be forever.
I’ve taken a ton of focus off of my fitness and placed more focus on my overall mental and physical health. Here’s how:
Rested more than I ever have
I trend on the “busybody” side. Meaning I always have something to do- whether it’s work, home, kids, exercise, teaching classes, cleaning, cooking, you bet there’s always somewhere to be and something to do.
This first trimester was by far the hardest I’ve experienced. I was completely wiped ALL the time. I was either throwing up, wanting to throw up, or napping for the entirety of it. I found myself relinquishing lots of control- something I’m not fond of. My husband took over much of the responsibility with the kids, and I’m very thankful to have that be an option at our house, and we ate more than I cooked. My brain wasn’t firing on all cylinders, so instead of working as much as I usually do- I binge watched Netflix. And when I felt guilty about not exercising my usual amount, I whined to my husband who reminded me to take care of myself and rest- my body was asking for it.
Currently, in my third trimester, I’m doing the same. Resting, watching Netflix, accepting help, and giving myself space to do these things without guilt. Because this is temporary and my body (and mind) need it, especially as this phase of prodromal labor keeps dragging on and on and on…
This pregnancy has pushed me outside of my comfort zone since day 1 in many ways, including mentally.
Asked for and accepted help
Upon getting pregnant with this baby, the first thing my husband and I discussed was my strong history of postpartum depression and anxiety. How were we going to manage that?
At my 6 week appointment, I talked to my doctor about it. I cried. I told her I needed things to be different this time, not just for me but for my family. I couldn’t miss out on months of their life again. She listened, was empathetic, and told me what my options were- which included starting to manage it with medication before the baby came.
In my second trimester, my midwife had me take the EPDS (postnatal depression scale). I was surprised when I scored borderline, but studies do show that PPD and PPA can actually start in pregnancy. We decided to watch it and I would call if I felt I needed help. As I tuned in over the next week or two, I noticed my moods swinging at the drop of a hat. I was struggling to rebound from these swings and spending much of my time obsessively working.
So, I asked for help. If you know me, you know I’m really stubborn and don’t often ask for help. Admitting that I needed to be put on medication was incredibly hard for me. Admitting that I couldn’t control this myself felt like I was failing in some way. But, it has led to being more myself and more present for my family now. For that I am forever thankful.
Being super open about my feelings and desires isn’t often my strong suit, so when I hired a doula and started talking about this birth- I felt super out of my comfort zone…
Hired a doula and actually talked about this birth
I am the classic “We’ll cross that bridge when we come to it” type of person. ESPECIALLY when it came to my last births. I really didn’t even know what a doula was and I definitely was not the planning my birth person. I just figured I’d walk into the hospital, get an epidural, and have a baby.
And boy was that NOT how it went.
My first birth came with lots of trauma. My second I tried to control it all because I’d felt so out of control the first time. Overall, there was an overwhelming lack of support and preparedness that I felt in both births and postpartum experiences.
Cut to me a year after my second birth becoming a birth doula. So this time I decided to hire a doula, discuss this birth, switch providers, and think about how I wanted to feel and what kind of support I needed during this pregnancy, birth, and postpartum experience.
And let me tell you, even though I’m annoyed AF that I’m still pregnant right now, I feel much less anxious and more prepared going into this birth and postpartum experience.
Quit teaching group fitness classes
I am certified to teach a few forms of group fitness classes- spin, RPM (which is the Les Mills version of spin), and another Les Mills class called CXWORX- a 30-minute core class. I remember badgering my doctor about when to stop teaching my core class during my second pregnancy, to which he responded “you probably know better than I do” and “meh, probably by 20 weeks.” I never felt like I had a clear answer.
This time, I quit teaching when I started noticing changes in how I felt and the need to modify most of the class- which meant I gave up teaching the core class at about 10 weeks.
Spin, I hung on to for longer because it was my first love. Last time I pushed myself to teach until 37 weeks and attend spin classes until the day before my son was born. This time, I dropped to teaching only one class by the beginning of my third trimester and a month later quit teaching all together.
This freed up a lot of mental energy for me and also allowed me to focus more on strength training, managing my pelvic pain, and pelvic floor prep for birth.
Focused on core/pelvic floor relaxation and strength training
I’ve already said I strength trained last pregnancy, but this time it has been for very different reasons and in a very different way. Last time I was just concerned about keeping my muscle mass, reducing body fat, and prepping to “bounce back” postpartum- which really isn’t a thing BTW.
This time, I listened to my body WAY more. And, to be clear, I thought I was listening to my body before but it really turns out I wasn’t. I was just pushing- especially considering my first trimester included completing a 10,000 swing kettlebell challenge.
I followed a pregnancy-specific exercise plan- first via my fitness membership, Strong Moms Club and then through my program Third Trimester Comfort and Calm to focus on pelvic pain modifications, pelvic floor relaxation, and preparation for birth.
This helped offload tons of mental energy and gave me a really solid foundation for training that took into account each phase of my pregnancy and the changes that would happen. Basically I treated myself like one of my clients… and my body is definitely thanking me for it.
Needless to say, every pregnancy is different and what helped me feel strong and supported may be different for you. But if you find yourself in a place where you need support and guidance, know that I’ve been there and that’s exactly what I help my clients do. If you’re looking for more on how to feel comfortable in your body in pregnancy, check out these 5 exercises that you can do anytime during pregnancy to feel more comfortable in your changing body.